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AHA moment - lowselfesteem

Posted: Apr 19, 2010

Well it's amazing when you have an AHA moment, but this one not so much. I have hated this job for many, many months now and continue to dred working every day which hey is 6 out of 7 days a week...woohoo!!! I have just recently started seeing a therapist for issues with myself, mostly I think low self esteem that I thought was dating way way back in the day and I wanted to get better so my kids wouldn't learn certain behaviors from me. All of a sudden this morning, I am crying because I am getting nowhere working, making no money every single friggin day, yelling at my kids who should be enjoying their school vaca, but are told to be quiet cuz mommy is working and needs to make money!!!! OMG OMG OMG how awful for them. Then it hit me, it's not my past that is making me feel horrible about myself it's this stupid thing I call a job! A job that used to help pay the bills and keep a roof over our heads and food on the table, but now a job that barely keeps food on the table or a roof over our heads!!!! It's the stupid job with this company that is ruining my life and the life of everyone around me! Easy for everyone to say, "well find another job"....well duh that would be great if there were one out there...check every single flippin day and NOTHING and I stupidly wondered why I'm depressed, anxious and feel about as useless as one could feel all for what ....????????

Keep looking for another job. Don't give up and by the way... - mrs.krabs

[ In Reply To ..]
Call that HELP line freebie benefit that MQ gives to everyone and complain about them. You've had a major breakthrough in your therapy. You don't need to keep paying a therapist to tell you to put your resume out there. Go for it! I'll be praying for you.

Low Self Esteem - Silly Rabbit

[ In Reply To ..]
Take a deep breath. You can make it better. You will make it better. This used to be a great profession in every way. Even when we worked inhouse, there was casual dress and a flexibility that other companies did not have. It has a been a very difficult hellish transition to the way things are now, but remember a little money is better than none at all, in the meantime, and keep looking until you find something better. Also, you are not alone and the majority of us feel like you. There is strength in numbers and they will not be able to abuse us much longer.

I could have wrote this myself. - Know EXACTLY what you mean.

[ In Reply To ..]
Hang in there.

self-esteem - spitfire

[ In Reply To ..]
Don't be hard on yourself. Had my own major melt down last week. Except for the kids, I should have written this!!
Its hard to keep going and wanting to do your best when you are working for a company that keeps you down, makes you ? your own work ethics, etc, etc, etc. Hard to think about getting another job when you don't even think you are capable of brushing your teeth/hair in the morning when you are basically told your work is caca. However, we do what we have to do to keep food on the table, the lights on; you get the idea. Just remember that you are worth something. You are a capable, amazing person--a WOMAN!! As I sit and type this, I have to keep reminding myself of this. Hang in there baby and all that stuff. We will survive in spite of them.

I sent you an email with job info - CO MT

[ In Reply To ..]
check your email. I left MQ last June. First job was not so great, but then I moved to a company that uses DocQscribe and I like my work again.

Thanks to everyone for your kind words! - lowselfesteem

[ In Reply To ..]
nm

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