If you have to interview for a job you don't really want, - MT Posted: Oct 27th, 2017 - 11:37 am In Reply to: Anyone else really feeling this right now? - laidoff
well, I think they often hire based on appearance and personality, so my suggestions:
1. Don't make eye contact.
2. Snort a few times, you know, like you've likely heard in dictated reports you've transcribed.
3. Act clumsy, drop things.
4. Don't smile much.
5. Don't shake hands, or do it in a very unenthusiastic manner.
6. Don't thank them for the interview.
7. Yawn a lot, especially if the main female player/interviewer is showing off.
8. Wear mis-matched or extra-baggy clothes.
9. Interrupt the speaker or go off topic during the conversation.
10. Express your opinion about how they can run their business more effectively; make it sound like they are total idiots and need you there to fix their broken company. But, be sure to make weird recommendations so that they know you really could only erode their business by being there.
11. My personal favorite: Before leaving for the interview, chop onions or garlic and rub a few pieces in the normal places where you might normally place perfume on yourself such as behind your ears and on your wrists, and perhaps chew a few pieces as well (unless you're allergic, of course).
I'm sure my comments are just common sense, but I thought I'd share. I followed this advice a few times and was never offered those jobs. Getting rejected is so easy.
Of course, if you really want the job, don't do any of the above.
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