I am so sorry for your pain. I do understand because my mother was bipolar. Self-inury is your way of controlling the emotional pain you are feeling. This is not unusual in someone with bipolar disease. Please don't be ashamed or sad. There is help. Your meds need to be adjusted. Keep working with your primary provider. If they are not listening to you, find another one who will.
Aslo, please contact this organization:
http://www.selfinjury.com/
There is light at the end of the tunnel. Hang on and understand that there are people out here who do understand and care. My prayers and thoughts will be with you.
Lilly 
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