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I was very upset. Physically sickened, the whole range of emotional distress.
Then I realized that it wasn't just about him or about me, it was our family. The kids would really suffer.
Believe me, it was no easy thing for him either. I had helped him get out of a sticky financial situation before, right after his divorce from his ex-wife.
I thought everything was all good. I could not have been more wrong.
So after the initial shock of it wore off, we sat down and discussed the situation.
There were still tears of frustration, anger, and all of that from me but there were also some tears from him too, having taken it so far and keeping me in the dark.
He knew exactly what he had risked but realized it a little too late to fix it on his own. He had no choice but to come clean.
He was absolutely drowning in it but he decided it was better that I hear it from him, rather than having collection agencies start calling constantly.
Your husband needs to hear it from you.
Maybe if you printed these discussions and had him read through them it might ease it just a little.
I wouldn't expect miracles but wouldn't you rather hear it from him if the tables were turned?
Our marriage was pretty rocky before this happened too. It's still not the best but we are trying to make it work.
Financial infidelity is probably as hard on a marriage as cheating. The deception and sneaking around -- trying to cover your tracks. You may not realize the exact depth of stress you are putting on yourself with trying to hide this.
You said you love him. That's the biggest thing.
The crud will only keep getting deeper until you start shoveling.
Come clean with him and let him help you figure out what to do.
Telling him the truth is going to be the hardest part.
Good luck to you. |
Ouch - my husband had to come clean to me too sm - penny wise
