It says everything that should be said. I in no way feel just because family should accept, in that were the case every family member could just stop in and that would be feeding an army. I dislike the bad manners to start with; never should you say you are coming to a dinner not having been invited in the first place. To be truthful, feel like uninviting the others he volunteered to drive here- if not for them he would have never known about the dinner in the first place. They told him at a Thanksgiving dinner they had (we were invited, working though, did not attend) and I really resent their saying anything about in in front of other family members who I did not invite this year. We usually have a group of 10 only here at my home, the same each and every year. Others are out of town. Thanks for the wonderful suggestions! I shall follow through.