I don't post here super often but I could use some thoughts (m)
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Posted By:
MT on 2008-11-21
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and support. Don't flame me for sounding weak or needy. I had a client call me out of the blue today (actually his secretary called me) and told me that I was no longer transcribing his letters. But were clear I'd still be transcribing for his partner. I asked why, she said she didn't know what his "gripe" was but that he made her be the bad guy. It feels personal to me, not because he did it on a personal level, but I guess it hurts like a personal attack because my work is very serious to me and I'd hate to think that he thought I wasn't do my job well enough. I know I was. I often felt undermined or a little accused by the staff at times. I was supposed to pick up x number of times per week and about a month ago they called and said "now, how often ARE you picking up?" which sounded like they were not believing I was coming when I should. I pick up after hours, have my own key. Other times I'll get lists of reports they need. Some I've given them weeks or months earlier. Some I don't have at all, BUT not because I lost them, because they weren't dictated. I keep a physical list of all reports on each tape I do and if it's not on the tape, it's not on the list. I mentioned this to the sec. once before in my defense when she's said "he dictated such and such" when he actually only thought he did or accidentally taped over it something, kwim? Things are so tight for us right now as they are for so many of us. I guess I just need to vent and ask if this has happened to others? Where you felt undermined and let go unfairly? Or if you've just had doctors come and go every so often for really no good reason? I feel bad. These doctors' wives are my friends (were before I worked for him) and I think that makes it feel more personal. I've been very good about and tried really hard not to mention personal in the office or the office when I see them socially so the two are separate. I just feel like he was unhappy with me and I often wondered if he was just by the questions the girl asked me and made me feel like she thought I wasn't doing my job right. But I really thought if HE had a problem, HE would talk to me so I was okay. Guess not, huh? Thanks if you even read this far. If you have a prayer or two to spare for me that it all works out, that I find work fast to replace this income and that my family doesn't feel any effects from it. Also that the relationship and my feelings are healed, that I can overcome it. I'd just appreciated any shared experiences. Thanks. (P.S. Not in the best frame of mind right now, so I apologize for any typos or errors. This is my disclaimer that I'm not going to proofread this, lol). |
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